Thanks for checking in. I am almost tired of saying this but our weekend was just about the same. She did go to her cook outs on Saturday. My only real complaint about that was she said that she would call me when she got there and to her other one and she did not call. I did receive a call at about 01:30 which I did not answer (at buddy's bar again- and no drinking) and when I called her back she said that she did not have any service, it was loud there etc... Well she got home about 02:00am and I strolled in about 02:30am. This time though she called me when she got home and asked where I was and if I was on my way home. On top of the no calling, my sister was in labor so I thought that she would be a bit more concerned about keeping in touch, and we had even talked about meeting to go and visit her, but none of this happened.
Sunday we went to baseball game-we always talked about wanting to get season tickets so this year I finally did- and we had a normal day at the Stadium. She did get up to "take a walk" for about a half hour. Don't know what she was doing, but my guess is she was on the phone. But, can't do anything about it. Well, last night we were at the hospital-where she works- to visit my sister. She gets up to go hang out with her female friend from work (she was apparently working last night) for over an hour as I am sitting there in the lobby. I asked her if she could show me where she worked and she did bring me by there but would not enter the area-she merely pointed down the hall and said "there it is". Is it normal that she is trying to shut me completely out of a potion of her life? I can understand wanting to have space but to completely keep a portion of your life off limits to your spouse seems to be excessive. I cannot imagine why she does not want me to meet anyone that she works with, be a part of anything that has to do with it. She is always welcome to attend work events that I participate in. I just don't understand why she is acting like this. I have always known, hung out with people that she has worked with in the past. I think that she is trying to set up her "new" life and does not want to have me in it in any way. I am a friendly, fun loving person with a pretty good sense of humor, so most people that meet me like me, and I kind of think that she has painted me as a bad person to her friends from work and does not want them to get to know what I am really like.
Right now there is a lot of speculation on my part because she won't open up to me. I am having trouble talking to her about anything other than typical light hearted conversation. Where is she getting her emotional support right now? Her mother thinks that she may be having a bout of depression- there is a history in her family- and is basically taking everything that has happened in the past several years (divorce of her parents, mother's ensuing sickness) and transferring her resentment and anger towards me. I don't know what to think about that.
Another thing that I have noticed is she has been shying away from contact more and more recently. We still sleep in the same bed and if I roll over during the night and wind up touching her in any way she moves away from me (and I am talking about the inadvertent my leg winds up next to hers kind of touching). I try not to let it bother me but it does. It seems to symbolize how far away she has become. We have always been a very affectionate couple and feeling her cringe when we touch hurts really bad.
Oh well, things don't seem to be getting any better, and as far as her reaction to contact seems to be getting worse. Once again, no fighting all weekend and no emotional contact either. I think I sound like a broken record. Sorry.
