When my H started coming home I was terrified of being hurt again...like you have a long history, he was my high school sweet heart...
All I can say is I think your idea of the time when the kids are gone is a good time...I would say take it slow...as slow as possible...also, this may be a bit TMI...but I would also require an STD panel on H...just to be safe...like I told my H it wasn't a deal breaker if he "picked something up" but I wanted to know what I was dealing with....also...put your feelings aside just a bit longer...let me explain...
When my H first returned he wasn't ready to tell me he loved me again....he couldn't say he wasn't in love with OW though they had been apart for a while....he wasn't ready to be "my husband" as he had been before...so there is a bit of a roller coaster ride in getting back together....there are times that you will question whether you are doing the right thing...if this is going to really work...and times you might even want to ask him to leave again!!!...these were all feelings I dealt with...I didn't ask that "my needs" be met when he first came back...it takes time for that selfishness in them to fade out completely...
My H has been home a bit over a year now...and JUST NOW I would say things are smoothing out and getting better...he is on anti-depression meds and is seeing a doctor for his depression...the one that he denied having for so long...he is finally taking care of himself which makes it easier for him to see how to take care of me...
OH...and keep GAL no matter what...I joined Jazzersize and go about 4 times a week...just for me...I also go out with friends...NEVER again will my life totally revolve around...yes, he is the love of my life...be his NOT my life!...I will keep myself strong and take care of me...this makes it better for me to be a good wife to him....
I hope this will help you...I know how you are feeling and it is a scary place to be...to finally see the light that you wished to see for so long but never thought you would really see it again...
