Well things have really slowed down since I have refused to argue. She isn’t really sure how to handle the non-argue at this point and with the help I’m giving her I think I have really thrown her for a loop.
The hand off of the son occurred early this morning prior to her work. I finished straightening out the house last night. She arrives early this morning and I just happen to have coffee and bagels, but only a bagel for me. Set the timing just right, she walks in as I’m about to bite and oh, would you like something to eat. As you recall she still doesn’t have groceries. She takes it and as she walks into the front room, I see this pause and a shake of the head. Kinda funny!
Well I ask her what time does she want to pick him up today, and she asks if I would like to have him until Sunday. I didn’t ask about her Saturday night and was excited to have him for so long. Then she states that she would like to have a “family date” tomorrow and go have a picnic. Well she has me pretty lost, I said that would be fine. Tomorrow is our Anniversary and I went and bought a card, nothing fancy, and a box of nicorate gum for her. She is smoking again, and a lot. Not happy about it, but that is her issue. I did by something nice, but that is staying hidden in my office unless some type of emotional progress or clarity is made and I see an effort on her behalf.
The S and I are having a great day, and right after 1, when she knows I have put him down she calls. She has no excuse why though, I ask how work went. She states that she has a lot to do and will probably be working on it all night. Sure! I don’t respond or anything. Then she says that if I need to talk to her or if I just want someone to listen that I should call. I said thanks and told her I have to go and will see her tomorrow.
My plan is to make no effort until tomorrow on the picnic. Even then, I just stick with the helping on things, and doing all I can to seem centered and have a good time enjoying myself. I know she thinks I’m going to call tonight, and I wouldn’t be surprised if later on after I don’t she calls back. I think I’m going to take S and go to a friends BBQ and just leave the phone home and see what happens.
