Where is the line between helping and being a doormat?
Do you almost always go along with what your partner wants? Then ask yourself, "Why do I do this"? What would change if I started to get what I want?
We all know relationships where one person says, "Whatever you want is OK with me". Is this you? Are you happy with this position, or do you often feel angry and resentful?
What do you do if you are in this kind of relationship? Talk to your partner about it. Ask how they feel when you are passive. Just this brief discussion will lead to change. If you are usually passive, then try to do things differently once in a while. Tell your partner what you would like when they ask.
There are three simple steps you can take to change this situation. First become aware of the way you and your partner are together. Is one person dominant and the other passive? Is it almost always this way? Then, talk it over with your partner so you are both aware of the situation. First talk about it, and then ask each other if that is what you both want. Maybe it is. But if it isn't, then make an agreement to change things around. Just a little at first, then more as time goes by. The first step, awareness, is the most important. Once you and your partner are willing to be aware of the situation, it will probably change for the better all on its own. Then discussion, followed by action. You really can change the way you are together!
OneWish's Story
"We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them."
