Also she will get tired of someone telling her what to do. Just make sure you let her figure that out on her own. A friend of mine's deceased husband used to coach a college sport. When asked by the AD why he never scouted opposing teams his reply was: "Because they are going to play my game I don't care what they are going to do, I know what we are going to do!" Make that OM POS play your game!
I took a look at the makingher happy website. There are so many books out there and so many suggestions on what to do and what not to do. I am willing to do anything, but is this the one and I just dont know if I am too late.
H-40 W-33 Married 13.5 yrs S18, S11, D15, D9 W asked for D on 6/05/07
Its hard when I have a family to support and bills, he has money and has offered my W to support her leaving me and pay for a place for her to live and bills. If he were not in the picture I would sell my soul to do it for her (or at least help her get started, certainly would not support her for ever and make it too easy on her, she would never come home)if I thought it would help us or give her time to realize its not what she wants. He has $$$ and no worries. I have all our bills and kids braces payments and cars and homes....
H-40 W-33 Married 13.5 yrs S18, S11, D15, D9 W asked for D on 6/05/07
Use "Making her Happy" to build your confidence and ability to speak her language and understand what she's saying when she's talking.
You have to realize, you have no control over W. If she bails and uses OM for his money, well, ignore it - do what you need to with yourself and with the kids. Let her burn out on OM, or more likely, he'll burn out on her. Make yourself more attractive to her by building your confidence, your self-respect, and attitude, and leave the door open to her for reconciliation if that's what you want. She has to want it herself and you can't make her want it. Good luck!!
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Thanks for the advice Spike. My mind is 1000 different directions today.Amazing the control women have over us. I guess the sooner we realize and accept that the better. My goal is without words let her see what she is losing. I know she will want to come back at some point, and trying to keep things from getting to a point where we ruin that chance. I dont know if I could ever have her back or even if I did if we could ever be happy if she goes to another man.
H-40 W-33 Married 13.5 yrs S18, S11, D15, D9 W asked for D on 6/05/07
Thanks for the advice Spike. My mind is 1000 different directions today.Amazing the control women have over us. I guess the sooner we realize and accept that the better. My goal is without words let her see what she is losing. I know she will want to come back at some point, and trying to keep things from getting to a point where we ruin that chance. I dont know if I could ever have her back or even if I did if we could ever be happy if she goes to another man.
Well, you know what - not being sure you want her back works toy our advantage. It puts the ball in your court and she has ZERO control over you. You're putting yourself in the right place and if she gets her [censored] together, she can come talk to you and you'll be ready. Plain and simple. It might take a while but you don't care because you're focused on you and the kids. When she comes back, you deal with things then because you're ready!
Good luck!!! Enjoy that book, I couldn't put it down.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
