But it becomes too late, the damage is done, and although you may reconcile, you always have the thought of "I left, why did I come back to this?" And the next time you leave it becomes easier. Or, your SO never doesn't give all that they can because there is the chance you could leave again. And they are scared to give there all to the M because they don't want to be hurt again.
Wow - I never thought about it that way - thanks.
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You said in a previous post that your EA revealed a lot to you. I believe we always see the best in our EA's or PA's. We have this high that come from them. Like this is the way it should be. And then when they are over, and we come down from that high, we look at our significant other with despair
You're absolutely right about the "high" - which is eventually followed by the "crash." And it was the crash that taught me so much. That's why I think my EA ended up being a blessing. An incredibly painful, messy selfish one that hurt other people - I owe it to myself and all those who were affected to at least learn and grow from it and not make it all for naught.
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So, if your plan is to leave and get yourself better with the hopes of reconciling, I would suggest a better way. If it is just to get yourself better, then you have made your choice.
Again, good point. Perhaps, deep down, I'm calling this a separation with an "unknown outcome" in order to spare my H's feelings and to avoid spooking myself.
Hey, I'm the one who called this "tough love" - means I can't go soft on myself and still expect to make progress. Growing pains, here we come.
