I can't say I have any suggestions. I am on the opposite end of you. Your goal right now is to get yourself better. If you can't be happy with yourself, then you can't be happy with someone else. Listen to me. My W is not happy with herself and I can't let her try to get herself better. I hate being a hypocrite.
If he is not willing to deal with the issues you have with him, and you no longer want to deal with them, then you have made your decision. Apparently the bad outweighs the good in your M. You said in a previous post that your EA revealed a lot to you. I believe we always see the best in our EA's or PA's. We have this high that come from them. Like this is the way it should be. And then when they are over, and we come down from that high, we look at our significant other with despair. Like, why can't you make me feel that way. Then, what I gather from this board, we start to see all of the good in our M. Like some things that were not that big, that we could have dealt with. But it becomes too late, the damage is done, and although you may reconcile, you always have the thought of "I left, why did I come back to this?" And the next time you leave it becomes easier. Or, your SO never doesn't give all that they can because there is the chance you could leave again. And they are scared to give there all to the M because they don't want to be hurt again.
So, if your plan is to leave and get yourself better with the hopes of reconciling, I would suggest a better way. If it is just to get yourself better, then you have made your choice.
