Wow! This is the first night in a LONG TIME that I actually have missed my XW! Probably since I have been talking so much about her over the past few days.
As an update, on Tuesday, I decided to be somewhat pro-active and actually formally ask her out. Since I know that she does so much over email, did it that way. A "hey, how about dinner and maybe a movie or something this weekend if you have time". She is part of an organization who has their meeting over the July 4th week so I knew things would be tight and wanted to nicely give an out for that. Didn't hear from her all day until that night. She called me from the airport. Their meeting is early and she was flying out that night. Talked for 45 mins or so about life and then said goodbye.
I had a dinner with my real estate agent who also knows my XW forever and also rents to her right now. She is not sure what is going on and has seen alot of what I see. Felt great leaving that one. Not only to start getting into the market, but also to know that someone that really knows her also sees her issues.
So....we shall see
CIAZ M 7/97 S 5/05 D 8/06 Both 33 years old No kids
Well, jumped on here tonight to wish everyone a Happy and SAFE 4th of July!!!!!!!!!! Don't do anything stupid and hopefully you will stay away from those who chose differently!
Just wanted to give an update. XW send me an email today. I graduated with her best guy friend from HS (no issue) a few years back. She for some reason found that our graduation is on ipod cast. Thought that she would send the email to both of us. Litterly addressed it, "Hey Both of You".
Now, Roy know who I am and it would not be a question. To me, would seem extremely ackward to include your XH on an email to a great friend who actually just spent a week at your house with his new wife about two months ago........or am I entering the CRAZY ZONE?
Where the hell is Rod Serling when you need him!
CIAZ M 7/97 S 5/05 D 8/06 Both 33 years old No kids
Hello all! I am doing fine…..just back from a working vacation. Florida heat is NOTHING like AZ heat! Had a good trip and got to see many friends that I see once a year.
Not much else to really mention on my front. I went to a conference for an organization I volunteer for and XW called me a few hours before I left telling me that the orgs magazine went to her PO Box. Not sure why. She wanted to know if I needed it and to let me know so that I could rechange the address.
We chatted a bit and mentioned getting together when I got back.
Gave a lot of thought to things and just not sure how to kind of move forward with things. Ughhhh! Planning to send a note, asking her to dinner for Thursday night…the only night that I have available all week until Sunday night. I wish my crazy life would slow a bit!
CIAZ M 7/97 S 5/05 D 8/06 Both 33 years old No kids
XW and I had dinner last night. Again another 2.5 hour dinner. Catching up on things in my life - 25 mins (I don't give her that much information)……Catching up on her life - 2+ hours. At one point, I think she kept talking for an hour straight without me uttering more than three word sentences.
Still tells me how busy that she is but it is all with work. At one point I told her that she is married to her job and always has been. She replied that I am too! While I might work a lot……I still enjoy life I told her by going out and doing things. Something I know that she really doesn't do. Felt good to say it.
Again, got weird at the end standing at the cars saying goodbye. Got kind of an obligatory hug but again left me with a bit of uneasy feeling. Make the offer to take her out and enjoy life a bit when she gets back from a girls weekend this weekend. Not sure she is going to take me up on it.
At this point, I have decided I am done trying with her. At least for now. I have shown that the door is open if she wants to come through it, but she is going to have to make that decision. I am done spending any time or emotional resources on this. I have been careful about my words so that she will know that I am open to trying again.
Now we shall see what happens!
CIAZ M 7/97 S 5/05 D 8/06 Both 33 years old No kids
Good for you! I feel exactly like you do, as I'm tired of reinvesting my time, energy and emotions with my XW.
I can understand if they are unsure, but to keep being the only one making any real effort at all is so draining.
And really they are the ones that have to make the decision, we can only be open and willing, so I think you are right for doing what you are doing. I think I am at that stage as well.
