My marriage is hopeless IV

[runningoutoftime]

I don't know.... she may actually be grieving. Just be nice and validate all the crazy things she says, leave the legal stuff on the lawyer. She doesn't really need to know why you are changing the judge... you can always say, "oh... my lawyer wanted to...," then smile and mention some of the fun things you're doing (non-relationship talk! Ask impersonal questions and be a great listener for her...). Avoid talking about yourself and focus on her. If she asks a question, turn it around nicely, caringly (like you want to be a support!) and ask her the question back... agree and ask more. Let her ENJOY talking with you. Let her feel good about talking with you... she will then miss not having you....

Also, this is important, change the subject when she talks about the divorce... and try this one. It used to make my husband really sad... I'd be super happy after explaining something fun I did and practically shout, "Life is wonderful!" For some reason, that really made him think. Also, if she brings up the date for divorce just be very nice and positive and say.... "Don't worry sweetie, soon it will be over..." Even if you are doing everything possilble to slow it down!!! She doesn't need to know that. It's a secret between you, us and the lawyer. Shhhhhh!

You sound really good. I like the way you've been handling things and I like your attitude. You're ready to move on if necessary, but leaving the door open until the end. I like that. And I like the kindness you are showing her. Remember the nicer, kinder and more loving you act towards her, the more likely she'll be to look back at some point and regret her decision. And ERC, YOU are a gem!!!! She is one crazy woman.