You need to figure out why you do it and why you feel you can't stop doing it. If I found out my H was doing things like that it would be ME OR THE COMPUTER. I tend to think it's cheating also. You are putting time & effort into other things, porn, chatting, etc. that should be spent on her or with her. Honestly, I'd be p*ssed off too. I'm not bashing you, just giving you my opinion.

If she is contemplating a D and that's not what you want, then you need to figure out what you DO want. If you want your Wife and your Marriage, then you need to quit the computer crap. You need to sit down and talk seriously w/ her about this. You need to take her feelings of betrayal, distrust, etc. very seriously. It will be awhile before she will be able to trust you again, whether she decides to forgive or not.

Me: 38
H: 35
S4, S5, S10
Bomb 01/07
Wanted D - nothing would change his mind
Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb
Piecing 04/07
Deployed for a year 05/07
Still Piecing 2010
M 11 yrs 05/10