I'm heading to South Carolina to visit my best friend. We've been friends since 4th grade. It should be fun. My bikini is not polka dot. Maybe it should be so I could attract all the hot guys.
I'm heading out on my vacation today. Hopefully, I'll be able to put this all out of my mind for a few days.
No more nasty tm from H. I am going to keep ignoring tm and phone calls from him. As far as he knows I fell off the face of the earth, and if he doesn't want to be with me, it shouldn't bother him. Whenever I get back, I am going to look into getting my own attorney. At this point, it looks like my M is over, and I need to start protecting myself.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
Have a great time, you deserve the break. Besides getting an attorney you should change your cellphone number. This way you no longer get TM from selfish H - you do not need his BS.
The cell phone is on my list of things to change. When he up and left me, he let me keep my cell phone (what a nice guy he is huh!). So in other words, I have paid his mortgage, insurance, etc. for months and he has reciprocated that by paying for my cell phone. Sound fair? Anyway, I would just keep it but he uses it to control my life. He checks who I talk to, and then questions me about it. I really don't know how he looks at himself in the mirror when he walks around accusing me of things when he has done so much. I figure I'll get my own and then give him this one back to give to OW (I know that is a little bitter but we can't be nice all time.)
Anyway enough about that. I am heading out soon. I won't be able to post until Sunday or Monday, so like I said I am falling off the face of the earth for a few days and definately away from this mess. Take care everyone.
M:28, D finalized: 8/28/07 Current Thread
"When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile."
Give the cell back for OW ... no way! I would 'accidentally' drive over the damn thing. When he gets mean, and accusatory, just put the phone down, walk away, do not engage in the 'conversation'. Don't play his game. I am glad you are going to see a L when you get back. You have to protect yourself, legally. Why did you pay his insurances (I can understand the mortgage, since I assume you were living in the house)? Do nothing more for him ... he has to see what life is like without you.
Have a really restful, fun time. You sound like you need the break.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Well, I am back in the real world. I had a really good time on my vacation. It was great to get away for a few days and clear my head. I have decided that I am done with this marriage. I don't think that my H has it in him to turn in to the man that I want. There is so much water under the bridge at this point.
I have not heard from him since the nasty tm last Tuesday. I'm sure he heard through the grapevine somehow that I was gone. I am going to look into finding my own attorney and see what my options are. I am guessing that he still didn't contact his. I don't want to be the one to have to file, but at this point that might be my only option. I'm tired of waiting on him and listening to the lies.
I feel more confident now than I have in months. I have a lot to offer and I am moving on with my life. He is only holding me back. Eventually, I hope that I will find a man that appreciates me for who I am and loves only me.
On a side note, my mil says that my sil says the OW is someone that everyone hates. She thinks that she knows everything. That makes me feel a little better, but then again it makes me wonder why my H is with someone like that when a coworker of mine last week told me that I was one of the nicest, kindest people he knows and that is after going through this. Hopefully, life has a strange way of working out.
[quote]Why did you pay his insurances (I can understand the mortgage, since I assume you were living in the house)? [\quote] I paid his health insurance for my own sanity. He did not hold a stable job until March, and I was afraid if he got hurt and was laid up in a hospital, I would be liable for thousands of dollars in medical bills. He has been hurt 2x in the last 7 months, so living the way he is, he is high risk. The other reason is that I am too nice. Well, I am not going to be nice to him anymore. I won't be mean, but I am not going out of my way anymore. If he wants to treat me like sh$t, he will see what life is like without me in it. As far as I am concerned, the only reason that we need to talk at this point to settle the D, and the attorneys might be doing that if he fights me.
Absolutely, stay your kind, nice self, but protect yourself from his foolishness, financially. Make sure your finances are completely separate from his, and that you are not liable for any debts incurred by him .... ASAP! No point in being a doormat. Nice can be assertive too.
Glad you had a relaxing break, and that you got a chance to decide what you want for your life. Good that you can take control.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
When he gets mean, and accusatory, just put the phone down, walk away, do not engage in the 'conversation'. Don't play his game. I am glad you are going to see a L when you get back. You have to protect yourself, legally. Why did you pay his insurances (I can understand the mortgage, since I assume you were living in the house)? Do nothing more for him ... he has to see what life is like without you.
