I need some understanding from the men out there.

[fightingirish]

WOW this board moves fast!!

Anyway, thank you sooo much for all of your replies (even though some of them were a bit harsh)... Ok I can take it!

Well I will start by telling you that I was very young when I was married 19. My h was very jealous and obessive. He has changed drastically since then. He's always had an overactive sex drive. He would have sex with me 2x a day if I said yes.. anyways, Last year I caught him posting a naked picture of himself on this site called adultfriendfinder... well I was crushed!! I left for 2 days with my kids hoping to gain some courage to go back and really let him have it. So his reason for this is he says "not enough sex from me" he said knowone ever contacted him or anything.. I think he was looking for attention personally. Well My baby was only 5 mos old at the time and My kids unfortunately don't sleep well.. so no we were haven't a lot of sex.. by that I mean only maybe once a wk. So things got a little better... Though I was exhausted I still tried to fill his needs. But my certainly weren't being met. My h works 12 to 15 hour days. He is a really hard worker and I know he does it for us and Im not faulting him for that. But it can be hard on me when I have two kids to take care, the house and also I do work for his business.. Im worn out. I guess I feel like Im not appreicated at all, and I think I do show him that I appreciate him as much as I can when I do see him. When he does have a day off he's grumpy and mean and then wants to have sex... kinda kills the moment.

Oh and kinky you wanted me to elaborate... I hope that he never finds this site...

Well he likes toys and such.. He tells me its fine and I shouldn't feel weird about it and he's being using them for about 3 years.. now he wants to use them all the time... I get sick of it. I want the closeness of just him and he doesn't get that. I have dealt with his use of toys for 3 years without complaint other than to tell him that we need to change up sometimes. I don't feel any emotion from him during this time and that is what bothers me.

I know he loves me, but I do think most of his love for me is lust.. (is that possible??) Sometimes he doesn't respect things I do, everyday things and just acts uncaring, but expects sex on those days.. like everything is fine.

Although I agree that he has needs sexual ones, and I don't have a problem with that, what I do have a problem with is everybody wants a piece of me until there's nothing left.. and NO im not feeling sorry for myself it's just the way it is, but something's gotta give. I am with the kids 24/7, I never get a break because I don't have anyone to watch them, and yes I get burnt out. Just once a month even I would like time by myself just to recharge.

We actually are going away for the first time in 5 years ALONE... going up to saratoga for a RUSH concert...So we will see how it goes.

Thanks again for all of your insite..