He could well be lurking Eddie, he knows my screen-name because I told it to him. I doubt it though, because I pull absolutely no punches here and he is not someone to tolerate anything even ever so slightly negative said about him. I cannot imagine him being quite so chipper as he is at the moment if he was reading here. Whatever.
Are you sure? I've never heard of anyone making major changes without being able to calmly focus his attention on unpleasant facts about himself. In fact I've never heard of anyone needing major changes who didn't react with avoidance, evasion, passive-agressiveness, or hostility to anyone directing his attention to some of the unpleasant facts about himself. I don't see how he could have made those changes without first becoming able to closely read what you've written about him with some measure of equanimity.
Originally Posted By: haphazard
We have been talking a lot more lately and it helps hugely.
This talking must have touched upon some things that he was once unwilling to discuss. If you learned new facts about him, I would guess that at least some of them are facts that he was afraid to reveal to you or to himself for most of the time you've known him, and he has somehow acquired a measure of acceptance about these facts.
Last edited by Crazy Eddie; 06/24/0710:30 PM.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
Question?? (just in case I can convince my H to at least try something like that) - does this mean that anytime during that time period you can get aroused and maintain an erection? And, if so, can it be hidden in his food and can you get me some on the black market (kidding of course )
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Supposedly, you have to be "sexually stimulated", which means that if something didn't turn you on when your equipment was working previously, it still won't give you a boner with the medicine. So far I have found this to be the case... if I see or think about something I have always considered sexy, I'll get hard, otherwise I won't. If he doesn't consider you as a "sexual object", the medicine won't magically turn you into one in his eyes.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
I was just kidding - I know it wouldn't work for my H but I have always wondered how it worked - thanks for the reply
Heywyre
M - 57 H - 65 1st A-bomb - Nov 27/02 2nd A-bomb - Dec 13/06 together 21 years *************************** Insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results (Albert Einstein)
Are you sure? I've never heard of anyone making major changes without being able to calmly focus his attention on unpleasant facts about himself. In fact I've never heard of anyone needing major changes who didn't react with avoidance, evasion, passive-agressiveness, or hostility to anyone directing his attention to some of the unpleasant facts about himself. I don't see how he could have made those changes without first becoming able to closely read what you've written about him with some measure of equanimity.
You know Eddie you could be right. I know my H is someone that plays his cards close to his chest. One of the new and and welcome things about his behaviour is "alpha male" stuff. I feel like he has been taking lessons from Blackfoot.
On Saturday he did a beta thing by asking if he could go diving next weekend but he'd make up for it by getting some jobs out of the way. I just said "Please mummy, can I can I?" and then "I'm going to go out and come back in again - this time ask me like an alpha man". And sure enough the second time he said "I'm going diving next weekend, what's at the top of your list and I'll get it out the way this weekend"
Just last night he grabbed me round the waist, kissed me and said: "Make me that toastie then get your knickers off - I've got something special planned for you. Phew! That's the kind of talk that gets my motor running. Naturally the toastie was made "with love" which always makes it extra yummy.
It's a whole different vibe, instead of "I suppose to get what I want I've got to give you something" it's more "I'm taking what I want, but don't worry - I'll see you get what you want"
Things also seemed to have settled down from the night and morning HD-ness to a more natural 2-3 times a week, which is great and fits in better with my own level of desire so I can be more responsive rather than thinking "uh oh - not again"
So Hi Babe if you're reading. You're doing a great job and I love it.
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
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