still wishing I could read h's mind but know that I may not like what is there.
seems we are getting the "family" thing down to a regular science... I no longer feel like the kids are my sole responsiblilty as I did before h left... WE are parents not just me. WE both care for the children and care for the house. h is friendly and kind...howeverI do still feel that something is missing. when h first came home (or first started to have a r with me again) he was fully attentative to me (well then he was only here 3x a week) would call often just to say hey, was asking me to sit with him, was following me around the house was talking to me etc... it seems now that things are just just? I knew things wouldn't stay the way they were then but I am not sure if things are good or not.
H is here H is attentive and affectionate to the kids H does little things around the house H stays longer in the am even if he's upstairs sleeping at least he's not running out the door as soon as his eyes open, and is comming home early almost every day (well at least by dinner time) H is accepting my invitations to do things (still wish he'd be the one to initiate an outing) H is on occasion letting me into that head simply by commenting on different things ( was talking about friend and friends wife)
H has not asked me to put my ring back on H does not say ILY H does not initiate outings (going to the movies tonight again my idea) H sleeping on his side of bed again (was getting spooned everynight) could just be a comfort thing is all it's not like he has a wall up between us physically.
well I could go on and on with what isn't there but that really wont get me anywhere will it.
things are ok I guess, I just feel like maybe I should not have let h move home (or asked him too) so quickly after his deciding to try...maybe we should have just "dated" I don't know and I don't think h does either. wish he would go to c with me.
