Em,
FIB is dead on. My W also told me that God released her from our marriage. She has total support from her, formerly our, church. She leading worship right now in a church with several thousand members. The music director, members of the worship team and even the pastors wife support her, telling her everything will be okay, just great and God is in this, He will take care of her.

In the beginning I gave her every possible scripture to counter what she was hearing. I asked her what did the scripture say about anyone, even an angel coming to us and saying something counter to the scripture? Didn't matter. Just strengthened her resolve.

Let that go. Don't engage. Agree. Yes, I believe God is telling you this. I can say that with sincerity.

You know why?

Because Eric Rudolph really believed God told him to kill abortion clinic doctors. The voice he heard and identified as God, really did tell him.

So yes, I do believe God told her it's okay. Yes, I do believe her spiritual support system would believe that D is okay.

Therefore I agree, sincerely and then leave it alone.

Do a 180 on this one, totally agree. Say, "Yes, I believe God told you this, I'm praying for God to tell me as well, I really would like to hear from God so I can have some peace/resolve on this issue. Pray for me, that I would hear from Him."

Then walk away. Let it drop. I treat it as if I was talking to someone like Eric Rudolph or David Koresch. Can anything I say change their mind? Nope. In their eyes, I'm just not spiritual enough or in tune with God enough or believe enough.

Okay. Let them win. It's a pointless discussion. The last time I talked about this with my W, quite some time ago by the way, I told her; look, you will swear all day long that God told you it's okay and right to leave. I will swear all day long God and his word say it's wrong to D and we can be whole as a family. Who is right? Only time will tell.

I haven't discussed it since. Don't argue with crazy people. To people passing by, it just looks like 2 crazy people going at it. =)