No, Heywire, she's not a machine. (If all a man wanted were a "machine" he could get that more easily and cheaply too!!!)
I do apologize having skimmed over tiredandlost's explicit statement that her husband DOES leave all the work for her to do. Yep, that's a serious problem, and he needs to seriously straighten up in that regard for the sake of his marriage.
But tiredandlost did want to hear honest opinions. And I for one am not going to post hear saying that she shouldn't feel guilty for not being willing to satisfy him sexually. Sorry, but it is an expectation of marriage and a firmly understood albeit unspoken element of the marriage contract! And when I say "sex is the main thing he gets married for" I am NOT saying that sex is "the main thing that he is attracted to, loves, and wants to spend the rest of his life with her for." But ALL those other things other than sex - HE DOESN'T HAVE TO MARRY HER FOR. (Actually if he doesn't have any morals he doesn't even have to marry her for sex). The old saying says a man won't buy the cow if he can get the milk for free. But when the cow stops producing milk after he's paid the price to buy her, there's no mechanism by which he can get his money back!
I am also standing equally firm in the statement that tiredandlost needs to seriously shape up every bit as much as he does. If she cares anything about her husband or her marriage, she needs to run, not walk, and pick up the nearest copy of Laura Schlessinger's "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands."
She needs to read it.
She needs to study it.
She needs to accept it.
And she needs to live it.
Effective immediately, and for the rest of however many years she wishes to remain married.
And if and when she's willing to get off her butt and do that, she will very likely just find that that miserable one-track-mind animal of a sex maniac that she thinks she's married to is a lot more friendly and helpful around the house. Maybe even that he's the loving and caring spouse that she originally thought she was marrying.
If a woman isn't willing to have regular and frequent sex, then she doesn't have any right to get married: she belongs in a convent.
