It is good that you took the kids to see their g'parents. It is of the utmost respect I have for you in doing that.
Along w/similar H traits, we apparently share the same father. Once about 10 yrs ago I asked him if he loved me (w/mom & dad on separate phone lines w/me), & he hung up. Called back the next day & said, "We all love each other", click. That's the most I've gotten & it's going to have to be good enough I guess.
And you're right, you'll have to use the DB skills w/out much in return it looks like. Sadly, there is not much to be done other than make the best of it & it sounds like you did.
