Living with my WAW 3

[stillme]

SD!! Where have I BEEN?! I missed your whole i-moved-over-to-Sep. week and have been playing catch-up as quick as I can.

So, One: Great news on the non-moving!! I'm SO glad you won't be going thru the S from your boys, and see this decision (and her reasons for it) as a teeny tiny crack in W's "Selfish" mode existence during/prior to this sitch. Yay, you! (Yay, her!)

Two: Great boundaries you set. Very strong, yet not controlling of HER so much as setting forth what is good/acceptable for YOU. I love it. Overall, very good - and hopeful (in, o/c, a non-expecting it kind of way).

Three: As for W's (undiagnosed) depression. That's a toughy, & I'm not sure (yet) about the discussion you propose w/W's sis. From my own POV & sitch, I know NOW that I was depressed during ALOT of the past X yrs (certainly thru the events & attitudes H brings up now as reason for his loss of love etc) but would I have been open to him TELLING me I was? (And his way of telling me was to put a finger in my face & say "There's something wrong w/you. etc.") NOW, I tell him that maybe if he'd brought it up in a loving & supportive way (and prolly consistently as well since I would no doubt have resisted & put off - as Still The Ostrich was want to do) -- who knows? I'd like to think that I would have - at some point - gone to talk to someone, esp. if H did it in a non-threatening/controlling/blaming way, esp if he was supportive (maybe offered to go W/me, if only to sit in the waiting room, or said 'Tell me what day your appt is & I'll be sure to be avail to take care of the kids...') But, again, I don't know if that would have made a diff. unless/until I - I - I was ready to know or at least be open to the poss. KWIM?

I'd be interested in others' opinions as well.

In the meantime, welcome back! & I'll be sure to keep more current on your sitch.

PS ~ I DID notice the revised name - LOVE IT! (i never could add that ? before)

PS again ~ So this means you're up for the Aug 11 DBing Fool wkend. Ever been to Cafe Tu Tu Tango? (My new fav place!)