Shocked H in NJ looking for DB help

[Bakit Ngayon Pa]

Hi Willing. I'm new here as well. Our stories are similar on some level - http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1105923&page=1&fpart=1

The advice I was mostly given is this (paraphrasing from my thread):

No R talk. Period. No Guilt, Pressure, Pursuit, Control.
Give her the Space she's TELLING YOU she needs/wants.
Act AS IF you are not an emotional-wreck (I know. . .but just go w/this for now). Act AS IF you don't know/don't care/forgot or are too distracted to notice/hear/see the neg. things (yes, even her going out at night). Act AS IF nothing 'bad' will happen, and she is only going out to sit at Starbucks until 2am. Honestly, do this.
Focus on your kids (in your case your daughter) and yourself - NOT your W, not your M. . .
GAL (Get a Life). Seriously. Do it. To do otherwise is to allow the sitch/W to control your Life. YOU have this control. YOU (and not her!) control whether you are happy, healthy & a "good/bad" person. Do something - anything - that makes YOU a Happier, Healthier or Better Person (putting the Focus on yourself).

Get the DR book immediately and start reading. I ordered mine two days ago and it should get here next week.

Good luck. Hang in there. I'm also hanging by a thread.