H was not stable before he lost the business. I think he was going into depression then. We fought all the time about the business and then the porn sites, everything just went to hell in a hand basket.
I don't think your H went into depression after the buisness failed. I think the buisness caused the depression. Well you can always tell H your ready to listen. At first he may resist then after that he may wish you never opened up that can of worms. Use I statements when you talk and tell him how you feel then - shutup in listen. He may accuse you of not doing your share or even blame you for his faults. Just acknowledge what he says and tell him if you agree or disagree. Don't defend yourself remind him that what happened is in the past. An I statement that may kick things off might be something like. I think running the buissness was tough on the both of us. What are your thoughts about that. In the end you may hear some very valid excuses why he did the crazy things you though he was doing.
