Love, what is it, is it real, does it matter?

[LoginName]

I guess I'm a secret romantic (i.e. "fool"). If love becomes a decision, how can it be love? Love transends other feelings, time, moods, etc. Or a part of me still believes.

I agree with you though, and with treadingwater. I think that you build that kind of love, by working on the R, deciding to make the effort. Maybe you decide to make the effort because you've built enough good feeling in the R that it seems worth the effort.

I almost killed (I hope almost, and not for good) my W's love for me. My W is trying, although she doesn't say it like this, to build her love for me again. I hope someday I get to where you are and she can say ILY and give me a heartfelt hug too.