Just unsure of what course to take right now. I am at a loss for what direction to go in. My mind is telling me that I should sit her down and tell her that I understand the feelings that she is having, and that I understand that she needs some space and time away and that I am willing to do anything that she needs so that she can make herself happy again. But my heart is telling me that there is no way in he!l that I am going to be able to handle a separation.
I have been fighting every day and using all of my strength and energy to try and "act as if" and GAL, but it does not seem to be having any affect at all on her. She doesn't seem to care about anything that I do or do not do. I know that my impatience is getting to me right now, but deep down I know that I love this woman more than life itself and I am having such a hard time letting go and detaching. I have spent everyday with her for the last ten plus years. Almost everything that I see/hear/smell every day reminds me of her and the good times we have had together that are honestly not that far back in time. She has always been there for me as I have for her and whenever things were tough for one reason or another, we would lean on eachother for support. Now, I am facing the toughest situation in my life right now and my usual support is nowhere to be found. And no matter what happened in life, I always knew that things would be okay because I had the most wonderful, loving and caring woman in the world who I was lucky enough to have in my life, and now that seems like it is going right out the window and the hurt that comes from it is indescribable.
God, I am depressing myself right now, and I apologize for the downtrodden message. Just trying to get my feelings out there since I cannot talk to the person that I would normally confess my feelings to.
