jethro, i understand how you feel. you know i am totally struggling with forgiveness and feeling less in love with my h.
it is hard because my h feels badly that he caused me pain and he didn't live up to his own expectations. he feels remorse for shock and pain it caused and all the other outcomes that happened that he never considered. however, he enjoyed the affairs, he said they were exciting, and they made him feel powerful. until the reality set in and the ow turned out to be a psycho. he had some fun, did some fun things, had exciting sex, etc...hard for me to forgive somethings about this. the worst is knowing my secrets were sahred. you and others here have helped me see that my h is on pain about this, and i think your w is too.
maybe my self-rightousness is getting in my way as i have a hard time believing my h's pain can compare in any way to waht i have been through. but maybe that doesn't even matter. we just have to accept what happened and make a choice to start trying to forgive. i think we are doing that or we wouldn't be here, right???
it is still early in this for you, and you are doing so well. you really are. my h and i have been piecing for almost a year now. and i am still struggling with my pain, hurt feelings and forgiveness.
