I understand your feelings though I arrived at them differently (h left) I eventually stopped looking at h as a man I "wanted" to be with...he was the father of my children...when he first came home there were some nights when I would sit on the couch while he was here and wonder what I was doing?? why was saving this m so important to me..had a thought that perhaps I was feeling then like he had felt before he left (only diff being I didn't have an ongoing ea to leave for).
I don't think it is wrong or bad to be feeling the way you are..it sounds like a bit of detachment and there is nothing wrong with it...infact it may be your key to finding a happy healthy fullfilling r with your w.
I think that what may have happend in our r's is that we stopped looking at our spouses as people and held them in a seperate class than all others..they were our love, our life our someone special...fact is they are just people no different than any others...they have faults they have strengths and it is only when we take off those rose colored glasses that we used to view them from and see them for the regular people they are that we can begin to accept them and learn to appreciate them for them and not hoping they live up to the them that we hold in our hearts.
it's time for both of us to let go of the past and start to view our spouses for the adults they've become and not the kids we met years ago.
LL trying to learn as she goes and wishes she were as confident as she posts on others threads!!
makea good day for you jethro, you truly are a great man!!
