Rob, I will simply ask this one question of you because it is fairly obvious that you and I differ on this subject matter.
We can certainly agree to disagree.
Originally Posted By: sofaraway
Do you believe that the loving detachment should continue on if theh spouse is continuing the relationship with the individual that they had an affair with?
Well, that's a tough one, alright. Let me give a couple answers - both of which are couched in the language of what I would WANT to be able to do.
First, if W was still with the OM, and I saw that she was happy and moving on to a 'good place' - then yes, I would do my best to let her go with loving detachment.
Second, if W was still with the OM, but I perceived that the affair was the result of her MLC pain, unhappiness and confusion - then yes, I would try to maintain an attitude of loving detachment while working on myself and hoping that she eventually returned from the mothership.
I'm not saying that either of these is easy, or promising that I could get there - but that would be my goal.
Thread #10 22 year M, MLC, Piecing since 1/07 Goal: Live with confidence & enthusiasm!
