awe, thank you Nikki! That definitely makes me feel good!
not much to talk about today. It was really hot and humid today, so after taking s8 to camp and s3 to library and then the park I was pretty tired at home, so s3 and me took a nice nap!
yesterday H used the money he made on our old component stand and changed the oil/filter/etc on my car. It's really cool how he's doing all these things as a handyman now. He never wanted to do stuff before, and I'm almost certain it was because of what I did in the past. For example, if he was working on something and couldn't get it, I would say, here, let me do it, and then I'd fix it. I'm pretty good at figuring stuff out, so it would drive me crazy to see him fiddling with something forever when I knew just what needed to be done. This wasn't very often, but still, looking back (after reading For Women Only) I realized, I was just disrespecting his abilities and I wasn't building him up, and instead was knocking him down w/o even realizing it. He never acted like it bothered him at all, but seeing what he does now, I know it must have had SOME kind of affect on him.
I need to remember to praise him during these times too.
oh, and Nikki, you made me realize that I've really been slacking on the whole GALing thing more than I realized. last year I was dressing up and getting all "pretty" for him and stuff, and now I don't really do that. I know why though, because he never acted much different. I never got compliments. If he did say something, he'd say, why did you dress up? So, I'm still thinking he'd probably rather see me looking nice, but I wish he would acknowledge it or something to make me want to fix up or look good. I'm getting back in the "don't really care what I look like mode" again. that's bad.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Hi ST - glad to see alls going well with you & also to share Nikki's thoughts on your singing = EXCELLENT
I was sent this via email today & wanted to share it with you/everyone here:
Quote:
Confession Against the Spirit of Divorce
Divorce, you can't live in my home. I'm saying to you in Jesus' Name, remove yourself from me and go into the depths of the sea. No divorce can live in my home because Jesus is my miracle worker. Jesus, you are performing a miracle for me now, you are removing divorce from my marriage. My marriage is free from divorce, in Jesus' Name. Divorce, you are cursed. The roots of you have been cursed. You are dead - dead - dead. Divorce, you are dead. Get out in Jesus' Name. The Lord Jesus Christ is my miracle worker and He is performing a miracle for me now.
Maybe you can get dressed up for you instead of H - just do it for fun and to feel good. Then it won't matter as much if you get compliments. (or maybe you'll get 'em from other people and make H worry just enough to give them himself!)
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
CM Thanks! Wish I had seen that email last year! Thank you for posting it here.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Nikki. Ain't it tho? I did try to fix up a little bit today, but H isn't even home from work yet, and I kinda have a stomach ache. Some cauliflower didn't like me today.
Sooooo, oh well for fixing up.
Today was pretty rough. I've really got to figure out what to do with s8 and s3. s8 was suppose to go to cub camp but it got rained out today, so I thought I'd let him have the boys come here for the day...he was so excited about it and shocked that I said that. Well, they're all here and immediately all bored. So I say they can go ahead and play the video games. Well, CJ (s8) starts playing himself and just being quite selfish, so I make him give the controller to the other boys first. That's how it all started and then off and on CJ is griping as usual and whining about how it's not fair blah blah. Then even a couple of the other boys get annoyed with him and don't want to play with him.
I'm just like, ug. what can I do? I try to keep everyone nice and having fun, but CJ just seems like a brat half the time and even two of the boys stopped playing with him.
It drives me crazy cuz whenever I try to do nice things for him, he is never grateful and even later says he was so bored and gripes blah blah blah. Then I've got the 3 year old throwing dirt in the house, throwing everything on the floor, going outside naked, pulling out my plants, pouring water on our couch, and who knows what else.
I hope I didn't create all this. I'm so distraught that I went on Amazon and bought 2 books about discipline and etc.
anyways. I did raise my voice several times, but I think I handled most of it all okay. I definitely could have freaked out because it was pretty bad, but I never did. might have teared up a little at one point, but I'm okay.
Wish I could have some kid military nanny come over and straighten em up!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I wanted to ask if you know about the 5 Love Langueages book by Gary Chapman? Well, you probably have - interesting though there is also one for KIDS which I've heard is pretty good and seeing you;re having some problems with yor, it might be worth looking at?
Hi ST - wow sorry for such a rough day with the kids!! Maybe you can call that Supernanny lady??
Hope today's a little calmer for you.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Thanks CM. I actually saw that book on Amazon too, but I bought the reg 5LL since I've never read it. So, three books for now is enough for me! But I probably will get that one sometime in the future. It's probably good too.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Nikki- thanks. yes, would love the supernanny lady! Today was better. s8 got to go to his camp so he was gone all day. I spent much of the day playing or being involved with s3. So I didn't get much done, but I DID however go work out at the gym for about 30-45 min! AND s3 didn't freak out this time there. So major plus!
gotta type more later...
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
