OK I need someone to just slap me right now. I have to admit I have been thinking about her 24/7 since Sunday morning. I mean I can't seem to get her out of my mind. Good things, bad things, analysis, day dreaming, real dreaming, old conversations, good and bad conversations, you name it, it's been rolling around in my head. Even when I am really busy with other stuff like a big issue first thing this morning at work that took all my energy, she's there in the back of my mind. WHY???
You know what this is like? It's like when you first met and are so enamored by someone you think of them constantly. WTF, I need a break from my own friggin' mind!
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
If I was closer I would slap you with a 2 x 4 and then you could return the favor...but we will just have to pretend. I don't know how to tell you to get your mind off of her because I am trying to learn that trick too...but know you are not alone and you are normal...I am praying for you
You have to throw yourself into something else. YES, you have to force yourself. I actually stop thinking about my wife for long chunks of time right now. It is very hard when I'm alone but then I just get on my knees and pour out my heart to God and that helps.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Here's what so strange, I am trying to throw myself into other things right now. You know what though the more I think about the why the more I realize I know the answer. I am staying at home with our girls this week while my wife is in Germany. So there is a constant barrage of memories even when I am not thinking about them.
Being in our home feels a bit strange right now. I feel somewhat like a stranger in my own home yet it's so so comfortable to be there.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
Take the girls to the beach, the park, the zoo, hiking, biking, swimming, camping, whatever it is you like to do and have access too.
I took S4 to the water park last weekend and he LOVED it, I got a season pass, we'll go whenever he wants and we don't have to be stuck in places that remind us of W (practically everywhere!)
Sitting at home with your pictures around, and your couch, and bed, etc, that will not help your predicament.
Have fun!!!
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
You know what this is like? It's like when you first met and are so enamored by someone you think of them constantly. WTF, I need a break from my own friggin' mind!
Yeah, i know what you mean. I think its kinda "overcompensation". we know that if we look really hard at them, we're gonna get turned off... so we trick ourselves into looking at just the good things baout them.. and then faced with such a "perfect" person, we go nuts over em I've been through that cycle once or twice myself this last year!
I say... enjoy the romantic "high", but also do stuff for you at the same time.
Enjoy the positive feelings about your wife. Try to remember them for times when you dont quite feel this way. Meanwhile.. just enjoy!
[edit: oops.. you said it was not all "good" things. well, in that case.. yeah, you DEFINATELy need to find some 'fun' stuff for you to get busy with! ]
Last edited by Dom, Rand; 06/21/0708:40 PM.
My current status: june 2006. Wife ran out and filed D. Finalized Jan 11, 2010, after 12.5 years M. 3 wonderful sons caught in the middle
Take the girls to the beach, the park, the zoo, hiking, biking, swimming, camping, whatever it is you like to do and have access too.
I took S4 to the water park last weekend and he LOVED it, I got a season pass, we'll go whenever he wants and we don't have to be stuck in places that remind us of W (practically everywhere!)
Sitting at home with your pictures around, and your couch, and bed, etc, that will not help your predicament.
Have fun!!!
Well tomorrow evening the girls and I are heading to our beach house. I'm sure that will bring a flood of emotions for me. It's been a retreat from it all but unfortunately it holds a lot of emotions too. She's the beach person more than me. We got the beach place because she wanted it. The girls love it to death and wish we could live there year round. The three of us will have a lot of fun there but at night I know I'll struggle a great deal. At least our good close friends will be there too so that'll make a huge difference.
If you've read through most of my threads you'll find I have spent a lot of time at our beach place. Unfortunately a lot of that time has been off season so it's really quiet there, not good. I'd done my fair share of drinking my troubles away there. I've got some funny memories out of that but too many painful ones too.
If we do end up divorced she wants us to keep the place together. I've decided I want no part of that, too many memories to deal with. It always feels a bit empty without her.
OK time to pick myself up because I am slowly slipping into the blues. It's been a slow, slow slide down this week. The combination of her out of the country and a very quiet week at work has been hard. Man I hope tomorrow we have all kinds of "fires" flare up. Then at least I'll have plenty to do!!
Well off to do a bunch of little jobs around the house for her. It sounds corny but I love tinkering around the house!
Man listen to me, as soon as I start detaching somehow, someway I get sucked right back in.
Last edited by catfan; 06/21/0710:18 PM.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
Man listen to me, as soon as I start detaching somehow, someway I get sucked right back in.
I can only detach so much. I don't WANT to detach all the way. I need to feel the pain. Apparently, I put my W through it for a long time. She never felt she could be herself - how bad would that suck??? So, I feel the pain. I don't dwell on it, but I don't detach completely either.
I'm doing good, no GREAT things for me, and that will be beneficial to her and S4 soon enough. In the meantime, when you start feeling bad, get to praying, it really helps.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
I just got laid off this morning. Not sure what to do with myself now that I find myself in the job market again. The hardest part is the person I would look to for support right now isn't with me. It's up to me and God right now. Time to dig a lot deeper with my faith.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
I don't hav the contact you do but the mixed signals are so exhasuting on our emotions . I am consequently dark right now as it is too painful to deal with.
Just wanted to say I am sorry you have been laid off. I am in the midst of having to find a new job. Just to let you know another voice in cyberspace here is thinking of you and sending prayers. Hope you find a job soon
Love and Light Bislandgal
Re: HELP! Feeling despondent and alone Re: New Thread ....Possibilities????
