he had an affair w/ my best friend & got busted

[Heartbroken]

I totally agree with Theo and Cat

They probably are not done - I'd almost bet on it speaking from brutal honesty. My H and a VERY good friend of 5+ years fell into an EA than PA - actually the EA is way harder to get over. He has gone back to her three times now and I am starting to let him go for good. August will be a year and if he wants out so bad he can go

H says it's not about OW they are only talking at this point - yeah whatever. I am finally FINALLY putting my feelings first and once again he says he's not sure what he wants - last week he was so sure he wanted to D and that he would not change his mind. H is in a hole and he cannot find his way out - he is not the man I married and at this point I am not sure I want him that much anymore. I am starting to fantasize about buying my own home and starting over w/someone who WANTS TO LOVE ME!

You cannot control your H - do not even try. Be the person you were that attracted him in the first place. No one wants to stay with a sad, moping guilt causing wife - I pushed mine out the door by trying to hard... Listen to the people on these boards - do not reinvent the wheel we have all learned this stuff the hard way and are truly trying to prevent you SOME of the heartache. I guarantee your H will be talking to her again if he's not already!

Hang in there!