I do not know if I should wait, he is in turmoil and no matter how I try, it does not seem to be helping. I am thinking of calling her tonight and letting her know if she doesn't already know what she is doing to him. I realize this will probably kill any chance for us to work our problems out, but I cannot let my son suffer anymore. Maybe I cannot stand by and suffer anymore either.
M 41 W 33 S8 S17 Bomb 3/11/07 S 3/28/07 New beginning? 8/31/07
I have heard that children need stability and that there is a myth that children do better when they are no longer in an unhappy marriage. Supposedly, studies have shown, that aside form marriages where there is abuse, children fare better in even teetering marriages as opposed to divorce. My H has heard the opposite from friends. I wish he would read a book that shows the long term effects of divorce. I have lived through it and I still do in my 30's. My mom is still strangely loyal to my dad who has been remarried three times. It really messes up the kids no matter what age. I affected my brother even worse than me and he is a grown man with his own kids.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
My parents have been divorced for almost 20 years and it is still painful for us all. My mom now has to plan her retirement alone. Yes, she has a companion, but it is not the same as growing old with the father of your children and enjoying their grandchildren together. To make matters worse, I read the obits in my city and I could tell which elderly folks were divorced because they would mention the children but not the spouse. How sad that is. While other obits mentioned the spouse leaving behind a spouse of 55 years, etc.
Last edited by mkultra; 06/22/0702:30 AM.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
I know and realize that it would be better for our son if we could or would work this out. I want nothing more than to be with my family. My son called awhile ago and was crying and upset that I am not able to see him today, and not a F'ing thing I can do about it. I guess I wish I was mean or abusive, then I could see her standpoint alot better, as it sits now, I have no clue to what she is doing, thinking, planning, etc... all I know is my son is suffering and she does not seem to see it. I am getting angry at her, that is something I have not been for the most part, but it is starting to show thru in my mind.
M 41 W 33 S8 S17 Bomb 3/11/07 S 3/28/07 New beginning? 8/31/07
