I talk to her virtually daily...maybe that's part of the problem.
Maybe? At this point, if I was talking to my W daily, we'd be back together, I guarantee it. But we don't, so we're not, so there's no sense worrying about it.
So, what can you do? I'd say, keep the conversation light, as much as you can. When she asks you hard questions, remember they're STATEMENTS! "How can I ever get a horse?" = I don't feel like I'll ever get a horse. She's not looking for a solution, she's looking for someone to listen and SYMPATHIZE. If she says, "I'll never get a horse!" That means, How will I ever get a horse? And again, you listen and sympathize. IF, she asks you for a solution, give her one and ASK if that works for her, get her input, use it, negotiate a bit with her, and MAKE the decision with her input. She'll love it! AND, it's a huge difference over how you currently communicate.
LISTEN, SYMPATHIZE, LISTEN SOME MORE, UNDERSTAND, LISTEN SOME MORE. Wait for her to ask for your input. You'll do great, and she'll see and FEEL the difference in your communications, she'll feel better about herself and you. Try it, get that skill down and use it for the rest of your life.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
