When I tried to PM you, it said you were over the limit.
i am trying to be strong. I am tired of making the same mistakes that lead to this. I am tired of hurting her. We both have our faults, but she deserves to be happy. I can't seem to do that. She currently cannot and will not be happy with me. i will continue to build myself, but let her build her self also. And if she needs to be away from me to do that, then so be it. now give me a couple of minutes, and I know I will reverse that, but it seems all I can do right now is let her go.
I have read DR over again and remember some of the steps that I put forward last time. It is harder this time because I keep having relapses of the same things that caused her to leave last time. Dishonesty. Although there were no EA's or PA's, there were "checking up on you" phone calls. I was scared to tell her becuase it would have lead to where we are right now. Deceit has killed my marriage and the changes i have been making are not sticking. I have had relapses.
