Quick question.

[RedHeadWife]

I would also add that if you keep 'expecting' her to cheat again, you're never going to truly trust her again, therefore, your M will never be completely intact. Vicious cycle there, I think.

I kind of go over in my mind what I would say/do if H all of a sudden told me he had cheated AGAIN, however, I nip those thoughts in the bud immediately as I am EXPECTING him to stay faithful from now on. If I kept thinking that maybe he was going to cheat again, I would never be able to move forward from what already happened and that's the past now and I CHOSE to stay w/ him, so I need to make sure that I am doing/thinking what I need to in order to get the trust back, not just 'forgive.' My C told me forgiving is actually an action which you may need to decide to do every day for awhile. There may be days when you get angry/resentful/whatever again, but you need to tell yourself that you WANT to and have chosen to forgive your W, therefore today you will forgive and trust again. After awhile I would think it would become habit.