Why is it that we on the inside still want to help and meet the needs of our W's?
....fear. Men, many times, fear their W's. Fear of their responses to our comment's...fear of their reactions....if you are going to get into a fight, why bother? or not doing something. Or....hope.
I agree with MinM. There are two choices here: -sit back, listen and do nothing, or -get a new MC
How would your W react? Sadly, it is hard to find a C that is totally pro M. IMO, they should never quit. When one of those IC's give our WAS's the "I think you should go find your happiness' comments, I think they bang a BIG nail in the coffin. Remember ERC...she's a big girl (yeah, acting like a teenager), but, we can't fix 'em and they have to make their own decisions. I like MinM's responses tho'.
I don't like to hijack, but, to the other's posting here. My W had a tryst last fall. You all must make a decision here. If your S's came back to you tomorrow, admitting they've made a mistake, apologizing and wanting back, would you do so? Would you be able to forgive them if they agreed to counselling? If the answer is a resolute NO, then, I agree with 'quitting'. Not every marriage is meant to be saved. I still have to make the same decision about mine. However, if the answer is yes...there is a lot of work and patience still left in front of you and part of that is working on oneself and determining whether or not you can become 'more attractive' than the OP...can you 're-push' the attraction buttons. It takes time.
FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
