Choc Credit card payment, $500. Nails - $52 Cellphone - $60 Hair (Choc. will pay for cut) Hair color Savings-0 Spending money Clothing and . . .and . . . BOTOX -- $240.
LFL unless she finds someone else to support her) and it certainly doesn't sound like OM can do it.
Choc, man what a crazy house situation you have.
I read your post last night about her spiral notebook budget and thought teenager in action. I rarely tell BB what people post but to counter some of BB's statements that most men are selfish, controlling, pigs, I told her about Mrs. Choc's latest actions and some of your history, about how you trusted her. I told her about the lack of affection you two had practiced.
BB asked a few questions about the forum, wondered why people would post such personal information. I explained I was in a group, fashioned like some AA/ACOA groups but we listened and offered advice and support to each other with in the group.
While explaining your situation and the group's function, I visualized what people normally do when in a stressful situation.
Mrs. Choc will probably tell several customers about her situation to relieve her stress.
OM#1 is the first person to hear her story in detail and respond to her. The problem with OM#1 is his limited financial resources and living at home.
Next I envisioned your W telling her troubles to other customers and telling it to a sympathetic potential OM#2 with some money to his name.
Mrs. Choc may not even think she could ever do an OM#2 situation but if her financial needs are great enough and she gets into a mode where she thinks she has to do something to get out of a bind, she might think she has no other choice than to accept what will be in her mind as "help" from whom ever will offer it.
I put myself in Mrs. Choc's place and thought what would I have to do to pay for things to maintain my lifestyle.
Cell Phone My opinion, no one should be allowed to become that addicted to a cell phone. If BB was acting like Mrs. Choc, I would tell Mrs. Choc the dryer event was an excuse to contact the OM and she is have an EA and to quit trying to cover it up and quit lying about her activities.
I would go as far as establishing some conditions when the cell phone can’t be used, or had to be used in the company of someone else.
Well, I am not Mrs. Choc so I could be all wet with the above situation.
My older sister was M to her H for almost 20 years when he left. My sister had 4 kids at home and many bills. She was always a SAHM till then. She tacked bills on the doorframe by the refrigerator, placing the highest priority bill at the top. She started cleaning housed and doing child care work. Some of her oldest kids helped her in various ways.
When her H left her, she didn't own a calculator so I bought her one. Using her “bills on the doorframe by the refrigerator” system and making drastic cuts and with her odd jobs she got through the mess.
Last year when I visited her, I saw she kept the thermostat around 58~60f. She does go to an exercise group almost everyday and she has a nice house and older car in good condition.
Her H's girl friend (OW) dumped her H after 20 years and he wanted to get back together with my sister (70). She is still in the same house and doesn't owe a thing to anyone.
My sister and her H were very religious.
Maybe TMI. Maybe nothing applies to your situation.
