18 mos and counting...

[MonicaP]

It turns out the court filed my application for LS and custody/support "pending" the fee waiver. I thought they were going to just tell me once the fee waiver thing was processed and then I would have time to decide when/how to proceed. So I am moving forward. I changed the first hearing which was set for tomorrow (H doesn't even know yet) to August 10th. This will give me time to have him served.

I can't even believe this is happening. It's surreal.

I am scared. I just can't think of a reason NOT to go forward with this - the obvious cause being that it's been 19 mos since we separated and H shows zero signs of waking up. I don't want this, but everything says that he is not waking up any time soon and I've got to allow myself to move on (symbolically at least). I have no clue when I will ever really be at peace with this, I just pray it happens.

I'm thinking that I should write H a letter at this point, explaining that I've filed for LS and that D will be up to him. I would also like to share my feelings about all of this openly -It will most likely be my last letter to him as his wife. What do I have to lose?

I could really use some feedback now.