Do you ever ask yourself that Jack? What do I really want and then just say f^ck it and do what you know your heart really wants you to do? It's an easy thing to tell someone, a hard thing to actually do.
It's not over, but I will stop MY pain, because thats the right thing to do.
Uh oh.....here I go.....stepping in and looking at the situation from both points of view. Sigh...
We have ALL been through so much......we are all Jaded and probably will be for a long time to come. The trust issues we are going to be challenged with are overwhelming. The greatest thing I see here.......is a man who is going to exhaust all options of restoring his marriage, not only for him,his wife but for his children. They once loved each other. True.....people can fall out of love, but in our sitch's....they are not actually out of love with us, but moreso lost & looking for answers to the demons inside their heads. Before one can trully move one, they must make sure in their hearts that they have DONE everthing within their power. It would not be fair to the receiving person that we (the jaded one) might meet.
Ok....I can only use myself as an example. Yes, I do have a male friend. However.....I have made no pretenses whatsoever. He knowes the deal. I cannot give to him much of myself as HE would like. Yes, I am sure it hurts him, and it makes me incredibly sorry, but he knowes that I tell him the truth. If I were to lie to him...it would be worse. He is fine with this. He knowes that I don't know the outcome of anything, but decided it was better to be with me and take the chance. Sobeit. His choice. Besides, as some of you know, I am far to independant and stubborn now to let anyone in. I'll be honest again. Yes, I probably entered into a relationship way too soon. I should have waited and stuck it out to the very end. Hindsight....
Now let me put myself on the flip......I would not want to enter into a relationship with another man coming out of a divorce and wondering if he is thinking of me.......or the marriage he so desperatly tried to save. If I knew that this man did everything he could do to save his marriage and it DID NOT WORK! Then I would know that he came to me with a clean slate and a open heart to love me.....just me and with (Quoting Madonna) ABSOLUTLY NO REGRETS.
Peace be with you Godbless
Jeanette
Sparkles, I love your post, and I understand what you are trying to say to me. I appreciate it greatly. The great thing for me, is that there is no one else in the picture at all. For me it is all about me.
I will be able to move ahead with no regrets at all. If I do find someone before I am ready, I believe that I will handle it exactly as you have. Honest and upfront so no one gets hurt.
Again, I really appreciate your insight and perspective from someone who has been down this road, so thank you for that.
As Lissie would say.....smooches....absolutely.....
