Do I need more time Jack? You know what I wonder, when you know what the right thing to do is, why should you hesitate to have the balls to do it? I know where my heart lies today, I know what I feel is the right thing to do today.
Do you ever ask yourself that Jack? What do I really want and then just say f^ck it and do what you know your heart really wants you to do? It's an easy thing to tell someone, a hard thing to actually do.
I do love my wife Jack, I also know my limitations on the amount of hurt that I can take from her. It's not over, but I will stop MY pain, because thats the right thing to do.
Just make sure that you have no regrets. No doubts, no nothing. Know in your heart that you tried it all that you used up all your compassion patience and strength.
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It's an easy thing to tell someone, a hard thing to actually do.
Preaching to the choir Ian.
No 2x4's no berating, we all know our limits, but sometimes we need that person going "C'mon One more." to actually find them.
I was in fact, in all of these posts, never ever saying do it for her. Exhaust yourself in your efforts, burn the reserves if you already haven't do this for you, have no regrets.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
I know Jack, and I am trying my friend. My reserves are running very low right now. When I told you that I need this vacation for me, I wasnt kidding. I know she will be there with me and that will make it harder, but I am really going to try and clear my head while I am there and somewhat recharge those batteries to see if there is anything left in the tank.
You know me well enough to know that if there is anything left, I will hang in there and fight for me. If there's not, then it is time.
I am not upset with you for pointing this out, I am grateful and completely get what you are saying. I do GET it Jack.....
And.......
Yes I was pointing out the preaching to the choir bit, you and I are starting to get in synch now aren't we?????
You laid it on the line. You told her she couldn't be there for you, that she couldn't be the friend you needed right now.
And you think she's crazy??????? Come on man!!
She's proving you wrong. She's trying to show you that she can be that person. Right now whe is telling you she'll be there as a friend... and all that. It will be actions soon.
Yes, go on this trip and have fun for you, but be prepared because she is going to be like her old self. No house, no job to worry about, no kids, no stress,-- just you and her and fun. Like one big long date night.
Of course she's not going to sleep. You guys are going to be in fantasy land and she is going to take advantage of it. You need to be prepared to let her.
If H and I and the kids hadn't gone away to all those gymnastics meets as a family and stayed in the same hotel, I doubt we'd be where we are today.
Was it you who told me a while ago that H was trying to be that person I needed and that I needed to let him be that person??
Well, you need to let her. Otherwise she is not being rewarded for her positive efforts.
Go to Scotland and recharge, have fun, be yourself.... but recognize the old Carrie and have fun with that too.
