I think it's fair to assume that he is hurt and embarassed, and I wouldn't ever want to do this to him, but I don't feel like I really had a choice. I don't know how to communicate that while at the same time being loving. In dog training, they tell you that you have to wait until the dog returns your gaze after discipline before you make an overture or the dog loses respect for you. I love my husband; I know he is lashing out, and that I am the one who asked him to find shelter, but . . . but what? How do I get him to respect me? The therapist session turned into "there's nothing good in this relationship and never was". Although the therapist listened to our respective "stories", he stated flat out that the difficulty appeared (after my husband's story) that we had never had anything good to start with anyway. I was left to jump in and explain that that just wasn't true. Do I sit patiently? Do I find another counselor just for myself? Do I air my complaint with the therapist? We get him free through my husband's job, but now that we're living apart, I really can't afford anything else.
