Saffie, It's natural to want painful memories to go away. I don't think it's possible to do in a healthy way.
You're now facing them, because before you were working on getting your H back. Don't run from them. Roll in the mud with them. Let them become a part of you instead of a ghost that chases you.
Find a way to stay with them--write a journal, do something artistic, be alone with them, talk to a counselor. Try to understand what's going on with them. Why are they nagging you?
Maybe you could write a response to your question from her perspective. What would she say about her actions? Maybe this will give you some insight that you're looking for.
Increase your awareness of what's going on inside your head.
The intensity should subside in time. If not, we can help you approach it differently.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
