Also, I think you are owning too much of this and still trying to fix it too much by yourself. My guess is that H is so unhappy for his own private reasons that don't really have a lot to do with you, but unhappiness with himself. (Yuck.)
I think this is definitely true. I'm not sure what the root cause is right now....possibly his job (which is what it definitely was first time around) although he is way happier than he used to be...I do think his job is stressful and overloads him at times.
As for taking on too much...well, yah, but I know that trying to get him to take or more of the load by talking is not going to work. As you point out in your second message, taking on the burden solo is a great way to see if he steps up. Historically, he absolutely does. The difference this time around is my patience level (low) and endurance (ditto). Working on it. ;-)
He's in a good mood tonight -- apologized for the crappiness of the last few days, etc. I'm not going to get complacent, though...I still see things as needing to change and I need to be here to do it.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
