P.S. As for the flybaby stuff, that is way too much for me, it turns out.
But, my C told me though that two things make a big difference to how people feel in their house, making the bed and keeping the sink clean. Neither has to be perfect. But these things really make people happier, less depressed, more positive.
So, buy a box of mints and make the bed everyday and put a mint on H's pillow. Keep the sink clean. Do it for a week and see if H steps up and starts sharing the load.
