Choc, perhaps so...but anyone who really thinks that someone that much younger than you is going to stick with...keep dreaming! What a fog she is in. I am 49 and I run, work out, take care of myself, feel like I am 30, am told I look 10 years younger than I am (believe me, I work at it)...and I would not give that a second glance. I like men my own age, even a little older. She might get money upfront, but her salary to sustain might be another story...she knows that. Aside from just the financial end, I promise you she will miss a strong man who takes up for himself...not to mention the father of her children. Just hang tight...you deserve more. I hope she comes to her senses and ya'll make it, but in case she doesn't...well you know. LOL.
I think you've pegged their convos about right, I really do.
Well, unfortunately, I've had some experience.
Quote:
She is who she is, and I don't think I'm in love with that person, even the pre-affair version.
I'm not saying you are, but make sure you are not engaging in revisionist history. Sometimes looking at something from a different perspective can give you insight. Sometimes it just gives you another skewed perspective.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
Today's exchange (read bottom to top) between me and the alien Mrs. Choc. Egads, she is in la-la land . . .
Choc.
Choc.,
Please let me know what my total balance is for the tummy tuck. As far as my cellphone goes, I already have my own plan. You had mentioned that you wanted to call BMW to see what could be done. Let me know what you find out.
What should we do about the house?
Do you think $135 a week for groceries is realistic? That won't go very far for a family. As far as full time employment goes, I've already spoken with Gary, however, I'm not sure I could make enough money, so I need to get with him again. When I work full time, we would need to figure out transportation for the boys to and from school, as I would probably not be available to do that anymore. You might have to pick them up if possible.
I don't have time to address anything else right now as I have to take S10 to practice, so I'll finish later.
Mrs. Choc.
-----Original Message----- From: Eyes, Chocolate To: thealienmrschoc@aol.com Sent: Thu, 14 Jun 2007 10:58 am Subject: Finances
Mrs. Choc.,
Today I have opened a separate checking account for my direct deposit, and will use the account to continue to pay our joint bills. As mentioned earlier, you are now responsible for your own credit card payment, as well as the other items mentioned below.
I will transfer $175 each week from this new account into our existing joint checking account, estimating $135 for groceries and $40 for your gas to and from your job and the boys' activities. If there are other necessary items that the boys need (haircuts, clothes, medicine, etc.), please let me know and I will transfer the funds as needed. I will work directly with the girls (D18, D20) on their needs, and have already told them that you and I will help them with $60/week for groceries. To help pay for that, I cut them back to a cheaper cellphone plan, and told them that they need to monitor their usage carefully as they will be responsible for any overages. I think we should continue to "link" our financial support to their "full-time student" status, but we can discuss.
I will continue to make sure our family's needs (not "wants") are met. I will NOT pay for:
- your credit card payment (I will transfer, each month, an amount equal to 1/3 of your monthly payment), currently about $520/month, to help offset the expense, since we jointly rang up those expenses.
- your cellphone
- your hair coloring (cuts are fine), nails, clothes, make-up
- additional plastic surgery and procedures (I know you used your own paycheck for this, but that was supposed to have gone toward your tummy tuck balance, as we had discussed, so one way or another, I've been paying for beta peels and Botox, which I will no longer do. We have other more pressing needs.
- take-out (this may be tough, due to baseball, but I will help out as needed)
- And we still need to do something about the BMW, which we cannot afford.
As mentioned last week, you need to try and get full-time employment as soon as possible, so we can begin to attack our credit card balances and get both of ourselves in a better financial position as we move forward in this. We can work together to make sure that the boys aren't home alone for extended periods of time, and I'm sure your parents would help in that regard as well.
The above arrangement is obviously temporary, until we can reach a more formal legal agreement on our finances, which I of course will abide by. Please let me know if you feel like I missed anything.
I thought Choc said $135 a week? That would be for her and the two sons (daughters have moved out)? $135 a week seems reasonable for 3 people. We spend less than that for 5, and I'm a really big eater. Unless I'm missing something here ...
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
Just let her figure all this sh#t out Choco. Unless your name is on the particulars, don't help her. I don't see how her income at the gym could possibly support these bills but again, that's her problem. I'd definitely separate the accounts in a legal agreement ASAP though. You don't want her running up credit card charges (which she is bound to do) with your name on it. LFL
Hats off to you (or I'll just throw my bra on the stage as it is customary homage for stars). I am really sorry about these latest developments -makes me physically ill actually.
