It got to me today when I heard H was bragging about being divorced from me last year. I mean, why did he have to say anything at all? Why couldn't he have just kept his friggin' mouth shut and preserve me a little respect?
The trip to Africa was a turning point, in hindsight. The day before he left, he wrote me a note that he wanted us to get things back on track as soon as he returned. But H was much more distant when he returned and it was all downhill from there.
I will be glad when this is all behind me and there's no more surprises to deal with.
I kept my grandson, age 5, tonight. He has been talking a lot about "papa" lately. He saw a man at the grocery store today and thought it was H. He got really excited and kept saying, "it's papa, it's papa". Of course, it wasn't but it broke my heart. H hasn't even seen the kids in 9 months. I think that's why I'm a little emotional tonight because grandson was talking about H and there's not much I can say. How could a 5 year old begin to understand that the man who meant the world to him just suddenly abandoned him?
