I thought H was pretty clear about what his problem was -- he didn't take enough time to sort out his own head, so he doesn't feel secure that he is making the right choices for himself.
Pretty arrogant of you to make that all about your actions since he got home, no?
H's head is messed up because of the pain in his life that led him to leave in the first place. Of course he is still working through that pain and still confused about how to do it.
When you make everything about you, you lose your ability for compassion. Truly. Detach, otherwise you cannot love him properly.
