My marriage is hopeless IV

[andyv]

ERC,

Don't think about what your W may or may not be doing. Enjoy your night with your girls and your parents.

And don't think that your WAW will never come back. You are assuming too much. The less you know the better. You can now let your L do all the negotiating. I wouldn't discuss anything with your W right now, re L, D or what you are doing or thinking.

You need to play your cards closer to your chest. I was guilty early on of being too honest and disclosing everything to my W. I have stopped for several weeks, and she has no idea what I am up to or what I am thinking. We still share our DD, live in the same house, look after domestics etc, but our "personal" lives are detached now.

She has not stopped calling me Andy for at least 3 weeks (normally Andrew, Andy was pre bomb). She still makes me coffee whenever she makes one for herself, offers me a snack when she feels like one etc, doing nice little things.

She is less nasty and moody (or at least trying to control it, has her days), and is slowly trying to re-push my buttons (which have no affect), to see a reaction. Good example is reneging on her looking after DD on Sat night.

As far as OM is concerned, you have to forget about it, don't worry what they may or may not be doing. It is out of your control.

I have controlled my issue regarding Sat night, I am going to keep DD with me (rather than palming her off to family, like W suggested), invite some mates over for beers and cards, then project the Xbox360 onto a wall and let DD play for a little while, then once she goes to bed, it will be "Deadrising" and "F1" till the wee hours of the morning for the boys.

The tide is slowly turning on my sitch. You can make it turn also. Just let her go, do what she needs to do with the D and anything else, don't worry about OM and start enjoying your life. Your W is so self absorbed in her own life, that she is sucking you into it as well. But you are better than that, and she will slowly realise this, possibly when it is too late, or maybe not, nothing is for certain.