So my parents have fronted me the money for the rental house. 1st, last and security. I'll pay them back once the house sells. I was going to drop this into our account and cut the checks from it but I decided it was time for me to open my own account anyway...so I did that with it. They rounded it up $200, so there will be more than enough to cut those checks from. Once the house is sold I'll start depositing my checks into this new account. Just more "moving on" I guess. Kinda sucks but kind of exciting too. I'll be happy to have control over my money again. Looking forward to taking control of that part of my life, pay off all our debt and get it straightened out.
great job Swashy. I know I felt kind of good when I opened my own account also.
found out about affair 8/06 H moves out Nov/06 D final 8/07 X re marries OW 5/08 _________________________ Courage does not always roar, sometimes it is a quiet voice at the end of the day saying... " I will try again tomorrow". -- Mary Anne Radmacher
I think keeping focus on moving on is what keeps us going. I spend a very small (almost none) amount of time on that 'how it could have been.' I focus on the future of me and the kids. As a combo H and I were not good at saving anything. One of the things I did is open college funds for each one of the kids. What a great feeling.
Keep moving forward.
Neli
******************************* Both: 33 Together 13y; Married 8y Kids: DD8 and DS5 Separated: 08/31/06 D Filed: 2/21/07
Strange that you opened your new account today. The reason I say that is I met my W at the bank today to have her name taken off of the joint account. It is now my account only.
Me 45 WAW 46 Married 23yrs D22 S18 D12 W moved out 1/12/07 Divorce Final 2/06/08
Thanks guys...not much new. W baked a cake today!?!? Little weird. I sent her a text about it...said she was just procrastinating studying and told me to eat some....aaahight...it was yummy.
Otherwise not much - been on the phone, taking care of the kids and then had to work for about an hour or so. Tired. This job is really kicking into gear now. Exciting challenge for me and really gives me something to focus on which is great too. Psyched to prove myself.
A three layer white cake with strawberry filling and homemade butter cream frosting. It was AWESOME!
Talked to W briefly this morning. Had to call her to find out what S5 needed for camp. Then she called back. Apparntly their old pre-school teacher is starting some type of after school program next year. That could be really good. Sounds cheap and they will be able to get off the bus there and I could just pick them up on my way home. Good, good, good.
As you know, I'm just about done moving out of my house. I wasn't sure if I would get weirded out about it, or down in the dumps, but I was surprised at how much I went in the OTHER direction - it's been really exciting, especially as I'm getting things put away, putting stuff up on the walls, etc.
Remember to try not to focus on what you're leaving behind, but rather on what's ahead of you - worked for me and I'm feeling GREAT.
BTW, I didn't post this because I DON'T think you're doing great right now, just an observation from one transient to another.
Keep up the good work and good attitude. And as Bruce Dickinson would say...really explore the studio!
Kev
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall." -Confucius
"God alone decides the contest; but we must put our shoulders to the wheel." -Adm. D.G. Farragut
Kevin-38; XW-36 M-2.5, together 4 Bomb-1/6/07; D-6/27/07
Right now, I'm not really sad about it. Life is throwing me obstacles and it does me not good to get upset about them and fight them...I just need to get past them and keep moving forward with MY life.
I am getting excited about the new place. Something just for me.
You know...I do keep coming back to a conversation the W and I had way back last August or September. She said that she wanted us living in two seperate houses, doing our own thing but sharing time together with the kids and getting to know each other again.
I'd like to do that if we can. Not sure if we'll be D'd doing it, not sure if it will make us better friends or if it will save our M. Just kind of looking forward to spending some time with her - yet be independent from one another at the same time.
I know she needs to continue down this road of gaining her independence and her confidence back. I'd need her to have that if we were able to ever have anything together too. I need her stronger then she has ever been. So this is the road that needs to be taken. I really do believe that. From there, we'll just have to see what the future holds. Maybe I'll find someone else, maybe she will or maybe we'll find each other. Who knows...but I'm starting to look forward to whatever the future holds.