Uhhhh... I know how you feel about exposing the kids to boyfriends/girlfriends. Just that whole thought of how upsetting and uncomfortable that would be for my children helped me keep from even considering getting involved with anyone during my divorce. And my kids are older and have seen this happen in other families!!! But I still couldn't put them through it. If the divorce had gone through I would have had to wait a good long time... just being friends with someone and not letting them meet my kids for a long LONG time.
Wow!!! I like that you were able to help your wife out with her car keys. Being a friend she can count on without strings attached makes a good impression. Try to show a lot of PMA like you are going on with your life. Work out, lift weights, look great, new clothes, even through you're taking time out to help her if she needs, you're very busy and moving on with your life. Go out with guy friends when you can (or just go to a bookstore and make it look like you went out!!!). But at the same time be friendly, smile at her, do some unexpected things. Be busy!
Try to keep up a good relationship with the ILs. It always helps with the kids and they'll hold good thoughts and opinions of you. I don't think they think of you as the "bad guy." By always taking the "high road" and being friendly and helpful they will think well of you no matter what happens.
Hang in there buddy! You are doing good. Probably one of the most common things I've observed in divorce is bitterness. Try not to have bitterness towards your wife. Holding on to that only hurts you. It hinders healing.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
