Okay, my 2c worth, if it is of any value ... you do realise that GF is actually OW until you are actually divorced (whether you are having a PA or not). No matter what your W has done, it doesn't make it right to do the same thing, and have an A (even if you don't view it as such).
I do understand that we all have our lives to live, want to be happy after all the pain we've been through, but sometimes we jump into things too soon, only to regret it later (much like our WAS's did), and all we can then do is repeat the standard statement of most cheaters, "I didn't mean to hurt anyone." Personally, I could never trust a married man starting a R with me. So, think long and hard, but you probably have done already.
Despite my sentiments (possibly expressed rather harshly ... sorry about that), I do hope it works out for you. I am glad that you have decided to keep the children out of it for now.
Good luck, and hope you let us know if it all works out or not, in the end!
I did give this ALOT of thought and I do realize that GF=OW right now. It's funny you mentioned it because I did in fact use OW instead of GF when I wrote that. I changed OW to GF because I feel it's more respectfull, when we see OW we do not conjure up a very nice image and it bothered me to use OW when I read the post.
I guess what I am saying is that yes I am M right now and I suppose I am no better than W because I am having an A. I admit this freely and I am very aware of my actions. I guess for me the big difference is that we are not sneaking around in the shadows, we sure as hell are not going to lie about it, in fact it's the opposite it's quite public.
I have apologised to W long ago for the things I have done, however after a few years of her anger and withdrawl and now 8 months of LS I will never feel the need to apologise for this. I know full well it may hurt her, it may not but I think the odds are slim that it won't. I can't help the fact she will probably get some pain out of this, the only thing I could do to prevent it would be to join a monastary and that will never happen.
BM I'm really glad you brought this up because this is something most here are going to deal with sooner or later, I really think this needs to be put to print and discussed so that others will learn from any mistakes I may make or see what works for me
