Thank you - I'm VERY new at spirituality and my walk.
This morning as I was taking the bus to work - I had thought about the miracle the Lord had did for me and my family 5 years ago when my daughter was born. He had found me a higher paying job duing a time when jobs were hard to find after I had prayed to Him with sincerity and tears, in my bed, late at night - just me and Him.
Then this morning this message comes down.
The Lord finishes what he starts.
The Lord would not have given me and my family a miracle 5 years ago to only have the family destroyed today - He finishes what he starts. He started a good work in my family 5 years ago, and I am believing he will continue that good work today and into our futures.
What is that saying He is the Alpha and Omega .... the beginning and the End? He really is.
H40
W40
S9
S7
D4
Sep:Nov/2005
Optimus
My Sitch
Marriage is like a garden, it needs constant tending too.
Well the W wanted to talk about vacation time and how we'd split between the two of us ... it's great that we are communicating and on good terms, however, it almost seems as if she prefers the new lifestyle of being separated and has no intentions of wanting to get back?
Things are working out, we're communicating, slowly doing things together as a separate family - in the next two days, were going to kid related functions and again on Friday - together.
Is this just the beginning of the reforming of a renewed relationship ... is this how it has happened for other prior to getting back together? You slowly did things together?
H40
W40
S9
S7
D4
Sep:Nov/2005
Optimus
My Sitch
Marriage is like a garden, it needs constant tending too.
I've talked to my W and Best friend who is also going through a separtion - both she and he initiated the separation - they both told me that they are happy with their decision with no regret? AKA - they are completely fine, no emotional roller coasters, bad days ... zip!
So, it would appeart that the WAS does not experience pain? Can this be? Or is their's a delayed one?
My W acts like everything is perfect?
What the hay is going on!
H40
W40
S9
S7
D4
Sep:Nov/2005
Optimus
My Sitch
Marriage is like a garden, it needs constant tending too.
Thank you - I'm VERY new at spirituality and my walk.
This morning as I was taking the bus to work - I had thought about the miracle the Lord had did for me and my family 5 years ago when my daughter was born. He had found me a higher paying job duing a time when jobs were hard to find after I had prayed to Him with sincerity and tears, in my bed, late at night - just me and Him.
Then this morning this message comes down.
The Lord finishes what he starts.
The Lord would not have given me and my family a miracle 5 years ago to only have the family destroyed today - He finishes what he starts. He started a good work in my family 5 years ago, and I am believing he will continue that good work today and into our futures.
What is that saying He is the Alpha and Omega .... the beginning and the End? He really is.
Not only that but He knows the end FROM the beginning, so this was no surprise to Him at all.
And yes, He is faithful to complete the good work He has begun in you.
I've talked to my W and Best friend who is also going through a separtion - both she and he initiated the separation - they both told me that they are happy with their decision with no regret? AKA - they are completely fine, no emotional roller coasters, bad days ... zip!
So, it would appeart that the WAS does not experience pain? Can this be? Or is their's a delayed one?
My W acts like everything is perfect?
What the hay is going on!
Baloney! They go through the same crap, they're just not going to show you because then YOU'D know that THEY know that they made a bad decision.
They're waiting around for us to show them we're ready to give them what they want and need but that we don't NEED them for us to be happy. It's quite the dichotomy. If that isn't good enough, they may be too damaged to realize what a good thing they're throwing away. We ALL have to be ready for that possibility, while we hope and pray for the ending we want. And we all have to be ready to work hard. That's about it I think...
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Well went to the Arts Center with my W, Son, Daughter, Father in law, mother in law ... to watch my eldest in a play.
Evening went well.
Got home, two boys went to bed, I had daughter in my arms and waited downstairs in her house -- normally she DOES NOT have me go upstairs - tonight, she asked me to bring daughter up to her bed -- may be nothing, but I noticed.
Nite all and God Bless.
H40
W40
S9
S7
D4
Sep:Nov/2005
Optimus
My Sitch
Marriage is like a garden, it needs constant tending too.
They're waiting around for us to show them we're ready to give them what they want and need but that we don't NEED them for us to be happy. It's quite the dichotomy. If that isn't good enough, they may be too damaged to realize what a good thing they're throwing away. We ALL have to be ready for that possibility, while we hope and pray for the ending we want. And we all have to be ready to work hard. That's about it I think...
JR2007,
That is interesting....... A very good observation.....
RMG
"The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren't paying attention to before." from "Good Will Hunting"
They're waiting around for us to show them we're ready to give them what they want and need
This is very unlikely to be the case.
They've already decided you can't do it.
That's why they're gone.
Now show them different.
OK, let me rephrase, I stated that like it's conscious. It's not. If they were 100% gone, they'd be 100% gone and we wouldn't be in here, we'd be in the divorced forum. In the subconscious, they want us to prove to them we can give them what they want/need. That's why these DBing skills and techniques work - because there is still that innate desire within our spouses to have us treat them (and ourselves, we can't be wusses) right.
So, they can be brought back with the right behaviors on our part, and it has to be REAL, can't be faked, they can spot that a mile away. And then all it takes is ONE slip and we're done. However, if it's real and we've truly changed, we can screw up and apologize and they know we're actually, truly trying - that's a big deal. It has to be who we are now, not who we're trying to convince our S that we are. You confirmed that for me Amy, so stop contradicting me
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Whenever I see someone acting like all this is conscious on the part of the WAS, I'm liable to jump. ESPECIALLY if it looks like MLC is involved (I gather that's not the case in your sitch) I can get ugly.
