well, in Cemar's defense (again ) I will say that you can tell the LD person again and again, until you're blue in the face, how awful it is; they'll generally not hear you...until they do...which often only happens by way of the "bomb", like with cadesmom, and so many others. Hat on, suitcase in hand, on their way out the door. "see ya".
"oh. NOW I get it..."
too late.
This other forum I used to frequent...mostly women, actually, who are overly-focused on mommy-dom, etc, etc...I'd see these stories all the time. they're actually quite proud of how dismissive they are of their stupid-h's "immature" needs. then they post about his "sudden" affair, or outright abandonment. everyone is always all "awww, there, there, sweety. its not your fault...". I just can't help but laugh. sorry.
I shouldn't imply that its just women, though. this syndrome doesn't seem to know any gender, as yet another new person posted their story here today, w/ the LDH. you could easily change the genders around, and it would fit just as well.

anyway...

Luckily, it didn't quite work out that way for me, but I can say that I told my W many, many times over the years. She just didn't get it. I guess her seeing some of the posts that I've made here over the years is what finally got it to sink in. I don't know...I didn't really "do" anything. So I certainly don't have any suggestions of what anyone can "do" to get it to sink in to the LDS's head. But it seems that they typically only react to something big. hence the term, "bomb".